Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
You still owe me one bodily function mess clean up.
You pee on the floor one time and you never hear the end of it...
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
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