i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
I just tried to light a cigarette with a tube of lipstick. If I had stayed in girl scouts maybe I could've made that happen.
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
i think the bruises are from the grocery store. on separate occasions. i've been spending a lot of time drunk at the market lately.
i have a vague recollection of being in the parking deck around 4 this morning, and on monday morning i was naked on the roof.
that would mean it's on tape
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
So I'm looking through your google history on your laptop and you have 'is ketchup even remotely nutritious' and 'alcohol with fewest calories but highest alcohol'. What new fad diet are you on because I feel like we could do this together.
lets just say that i have already today: gotten drunk, got in a fight, got stranded an hour away from home, found a ride, sobered up, and slept. woken back up, and here i am. its been a long day. Day drinking is bad for friendships.
last nights episode of shot friends brought to you by polish vodka and flamingo baseball. pickles cure hangovers.
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
I just want to drink cheap wine and throw my bra at an aging singer songwriter
You ran into the tattoo shop screaming PIERCE MY TITIES
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
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