Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
it turns out vodka filled condoms arent that funny
i just practiced my bj skills on a banana in front of the mirror
its going to be a good night
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
I'm going to fuck my way out of the friend zone if its the last thing I do
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
Hearing them have a conversation is like listening to water buffalo have sex. Awkward and scarring.
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
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