im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
Any questions about why there was a scuba tank chilling in the hot tub this morning?
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
Why are there 17 orders of shrimp lo mein in the bathtub?
We kicked down a door together last night, pretty sure that qualifies us as best friends.
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
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