I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
I was in the bathroom puking up mountains of tequila and when he came to help me, I held the door shut and kept yelling at him to let me be a lady.
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
You were running around yelling "BUKAKE!" and squirting people with a shampoo bottle you found. Total shitshow.
HURRY. I NEED DRUNK. MORE DRUNK.
My vibrator looks like a lipstick tube. So does my mace. I just realized the potential problems of keeping them both in the same bag.
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
Do you ever look at someone's Snapchat story and think ‘you told me you would eat my ass’?
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
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