just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
Almost just got kicked out of a bar because the locals spilled beer everywhere when we taught them to shotgun.
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
This message brought to you by inappropriate slogans. Cotton candy, melting in your mouth like boners.
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
BOOM BITCH SERVES YOU RIGHT I HOPE YOU SHIT YOURSELF PETER PAN
They just made me take another shot and I found out the liquor store next to my brothers house has a petting zoo
Mind. Blown.
Is it bad that whip cream tastes like sex to me?
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
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