We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
On the bright side his mom approves of me. Though it's apparently because she sleeps with married men and has a soft spot for "fellow homewreckers"
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
I told you, I'm taking a sledgehammer to your walls. Fuck your walls.
I'm Batman.
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
Just confirming I will be washing my asshole at your house at approximately 2:45 tomorrow afternoon.
The strangest confirmation message ever sent.
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