Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
Found my sandals in your freezer this morning, THANKS
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
Swear to god, somebody just drove by with mickey mouse in their passenger seat and he waved at me.
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
Randomize
