As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
And she was like "I wanted you all for myself, to love you, and treat you like gold."... See this is why I shouldn't fuck Italian chicks...
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
Just picked them up. It took 6 holes and a handle of rum to evolve from golf to a demolition derby.
There's an entire pit crew of cart boys surveying the golf cart destruction.
I have an explanation for how we got this drunk this fast... but you wont like it. We are officially in complete liver failure.
This must be what defeat feels like to Tom Brady today. I bet he wishes he could barf up all of his bad decisions from yesterday, too.
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
Nothing says girls night like wine cheese and pregnancy tests 😂
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
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