We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
Through a series of unfortunate circumstances, I think I just sprayed lime juice on my vagina.
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
blah blah blah they called me an alcoholic because I threw my beer at a Jesus freak. it was for the best
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
I don't know what you're doing this morning, but obtaining Plan B is my number-one priority.
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
DO I FUCKING *LOOK* LIKE SOMEONE WHO HAS THEIR ACT TOGETHER!?!? THE ANSWER IS "NO"!
Randomize
