Do you think if I drink bleach they will let me leave work?
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
Looked for my lighter in the console and found more tampons. Seriously. You're like a squirrel prepping for a hard winter. A menstruating squirrel.
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
There comes a point where there's just condoms and old mcdonalds in your garbage can and you can't tell if you've won or lost.
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
Randomize
