also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
He's slurring his text. I didn't think that was possible.
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
i feel like if we ever had babies together they would just be drunk all the time
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
She was going down on me before I had a chance to tell her I arrested her brother 3 hours earlier
The fact that u had sex with a Disney prince blows my mind, you're my hero.
So I forgot to ask, how was that bartender you slept with two weeks ago?
Google chlamydia.
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
Randomize
