My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
You rang?
Saw a ginger and the first thing I thought of doing was yelling "you have no soul!" so I called you so we can yell it together with you on speakerphone.
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
He showed up at my house with roses and a bottle of vodka... to watch a movie. obvi i took the vodka and didn't sleep with him
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
Randomize
