Did you ever feel like going into a planned parenthood and performing an abortion in front of them?
Umm..who the fuck is this?
Oh shit
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
I'm experimenting with sincerity
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
Randomize
