i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
Facials are how you say "I love you" in porn star.
So I'm driving and this guy next to me at the stop light is reving his engine and honking at me. Motherfucker thinks that's because I'm asian and drive a honda I'm automatically going to race him
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it.
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
Drunk at ten am watching Californication re runs. Being divorced rules.
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
You don't understand!!! BACON ROSES!!! Why are you not more excited?!
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
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