i just borrowed 5 dollars from my eight year old sister. i'm at a new low
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
you were mass sexting so we took your phone away
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
I hope he didn't notice that my shirt was inside out when I told him I didn't have sex with the guy. Kind of a dead giveaway.
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
Is there ever a non-asshole time to play the "I was a child prodigy" card?
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
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