So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
my hip hurts so fuckin bad. and I just found a half eaten burrito in my nightstand drawer.
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
Woke up to my asscrack filled with melted Reese's Pieces. Halloween parties are so weird here man
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
Well I just put wine in my tea
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
Randomize
