You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
Dude, I just spun my iPhone on my boner without it falling off. I belong in cirque du soleil.
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
She was indeed spoonfeeding you potato salad out of that giant bowl with a giant spoon. Dont feel special, she was giving it to everyone that left the bar.
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
I feel like I've been hit by a truck, flew up and landed on a fence post that went straight through my vagina. No more vodka and sex for a while.
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
Had to admit my broken elbow was caused by vodka, not hockey
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
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