Are you missing anything? I found a wedding ring in my bed this morning.....
While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
I think it might be brain cancer. Hangovers can't be this bad
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
How do I explain the handcuffs and tanning goggles on our living room floor? There's rope too. The cats love the rope.
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
I just made kick ass drunk stir fry while taking care of three other drunk people and doing shots. I don't understand how that's not wife material
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
Randomize