Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
I needed to borrow my dads nail clippers and next to it was an industrial size box of condoms if that wasnt bad enough I dropped the clippers behind the bed and discovered hundreds of used condoms
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
Hunting for men at chipotle... I feel like I should be more disappointed that this is the way my life is going but I'm really just excited for the potential.
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
Randomize
