I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
Look at you go. You're like the Slutty Librarian that Could. They should write children's books about you. Children's books for adults.
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
I'm going to have to have a long talk with god if my soul mate has a prince albert
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
Can my mom come with to the bar? Prince just died and I feel like I need to take her out to cheer her up.
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
Randomize
