Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
porn star boner night. come get it.
I woke up to an email from Groupon for 3 laser lipo treatments...on Valentine's Day...way to kick me when I'm down Groupon.
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
Please assure him that the flying penis statue is for display purposes only.
When you're awkward as a teenager, it never goes away. You just mask it. With makeup. And boobs.
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
I just found a bag of chex mix in my clutch
You were feeding it to the bartender last night
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
Randomize
