We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
We don't need a hotel, we'll just sleep in the post office.
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
He rubbed aloe on my sunburn while I blew him... could he be anymore perfect?
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
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