she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
P.S. It's common courtesy to let the girl your banging know if she's about to walk into the same place your girlfriend is at so she can get her poker face ready
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
Shit happens dude.
Shit doesn't just HAPPEN on the kitchen floor you asshole.
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
Randomize
