What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
Any particular reason you put 2 smashed up limes in my back pocket last night?
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
I walk in to see her roommate half naked on their stripper pole. I knew I was home.
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
I just saw two homeless guys bond over the fact that they both use Crown Royal bags as wallets in Burger King.
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
Just wore the promise ring dad gave me freshman year of high school as a fake wedding band while I bought a pregnancy test. I think it's safe to say that's not what he had in mind with that gift 14 years ago.
I know we agreed to cock block each other from now on buttt I WANT this one. I have felt his penis, it is godly, and I am going to have it inside of me, so shut the fuck up and leave.
Randomize
