I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
Just figured out why my bed smells like weed: I just found a bowl in my pillow case?
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
You are the alcoholic guardian angel of raccoons
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
You kept saying “keke” over and over so I slapped you then you proceeded to ask if I loved you. In case you’re wondering why you have a black eye - Lauren
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