I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
there was a party in your bed and you weren't invited... change your sheets
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
I think the multiple Sunday morning sirens outside my window are a plot by the cops to get back at me for the shit we pulled last night. Or I should move to a better area.
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
He's like a unicorn and I just wanna domesticate him
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
Randomize
