All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
the paramedic just looked at me like "you again?"
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
He kept falling asleep with the pizza in his hand. I woke him up and told him and he was shocked because he thought he ate it all. Then he would end up falling asleep and we'd repeat the whole process again.
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
I'm the catering manager, it's not my job to stop 2 teenagers from fucking in the bathroom. I couldn't bring myself to stop that sort of young romance anyway, that's what I pay you people for
Fuck my life he IS a stripper, Ive been sleeping with a stripper named Phoenix. damnit, I knew the sex was too good
and eventually we just all took our pants off
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
Randomize
