So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
I picked her up for our first date on a fucking horse. Of course I got a BJ.
she's googling pictures of Freddy Mercury and whispering 'I'm ready'
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
If I had a quarter for every time I had sex in your bed while you were out of town, I would probably be a lot more willing to buy you new sheets. Hope you're having a nice vacation.
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
Snorting lines of xanex off the back of my grandparents toilet before church. Thinking of u.
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
Don't judge them too harshly for getting kicked out of a strip club. Happens to the best of us.
You are the coolest girlfriend ever.
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
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