Britney fell asleep on the couch in the foier, got up stripped then pissed on the floor. Then got dressed and went to sleep in it. Also downstairs toilet clogged. Not me. I will be gone by the time you get home from work. Have fun.
Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
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