I am going to give you the keys to my place
Then I'll give you the keys to my heart
Gag me
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
I'll be waiting for you under the stairs with peanut butter and tequila ... Don't tell the neighbors
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
I just saw a 3 year old try to break out of a daycare by driving a big wheel at full speed into a metal gate. Today is going to be epic.
I wish we never smoked. I'm literally laying in bed opening and closing my eyes, just hoping a hot dog stand will appear in the room.
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
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