PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
She kept saying the tortilla understood her. I honestly don't know where she found a tortilla at the pool.
I'm so in the Halloween spirit, I zombified my all of my nudes on my phone. Tell me this isn't creative.
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
I just spent 10 min explaining to my mom how orange is a strange color. I think she knows
Stephen I'm in a lecture and the lecturer just said 'you can CHOOSE to put something in your mouth and swallow it" i'm the only one here who burst out laughing, this is awkward. Thought you'd appreciate it.
They'll never let you practice medicine.
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
I just told a guy I'm a cross of Kim K, Hilary Clinton and a dragon... He was still into it.
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
Randomize