Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
This is the last time I call a hotel to see if you or some random guy paid for the room last night.
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
You tried to sled down the middle of the street. In. Your. Coat. Of course you are bruised.
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
Because you touch yourself at night.
...What time of day am I supposed to do it?
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
Randomize
