It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
It's one of the many facets of my drunken alter egos. I'm like substance abuse batman.
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
Last night's dream consisted of you, me, a sauce pan full of cocaine and light sabers. I almost cried when I woke up.
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
Just got a blow job from a woman on a ski slope. She said ski'ing frightens her and giving head calms her down. Glad I could help ma'am!
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
Randomize
