what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
My doctor just informed me that my food allergies qualify me for a medical marijuana license. I get it on Tuesday. It won't help at all, but my life is awesome!
i found a beer bottle on top of the urinal, peed in it and put it back... if anyone gets drunk enough to fall for it they deserve it
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
No. I'm drinking straight up vodka right now. With a pineapple in it.
That'll put some boobs in that bra.
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
Currently sitting in the movie theatre bathroom while she gives him a blowjob in the parking lot. Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend.
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
Randomize