sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
Upside of a two-day migraine: thanks to a prominent "E" in the middle of every pill, I think we can totally pass off Excedrine Migraine as ecstasy to stupid, drunk freshman. This is totally going to happen. That entrepreneurship course is paying off.
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
Randomize
