i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
Some older looking guy gave me his card as he exited the train. Hes a pharmaceutical rep. I'm debating asking him for a job. Obv he wants sex but if I can get a job out of this maybe I can offer him more than a cheap dry handjob bc that's all I'm really up for these days
I'm shotgunning a 12 pack at a bus stop. This is why we pay the rent with an auto withdrawal at the beginning of the month
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
I threw up vodka and borscht. I'm done with life...I threw this up in a McDonald's bathroom btw.
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
Randomize
