Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
im still trying to figure out who put the honey mustard in the blender then put the entire blender into the freezer
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
So, do you ever feel like EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOUR FRIENDS IS INVOLVED IN A MASSIVE AND INTRICATE CONSPIRACY TO COCKBLOCK YOU AT ALL COSTS?
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
Okay, tomorrow we'll have a day of life-sorting and plasma-selling.
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
I'm literally naked with a whole pizza in my lap sitting in my chair.
Randomize
