Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
There are the 2 BIGGEST tools by me-- at our table. I hate them. But they're not ugly and I may make out with them later. And hate myself. Definitely hate myself.
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
Randomize
