i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
Saying we were separated at birth, got on a ship and sailed here via onion barrel from Somalia didn't help our case at all....
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
I texted him in the morning wishing him a day as spectacular as his dick was.
Can we just talk about the fact that the last time I got laid I was wearing a Jurassic Park tshirt?
What's the best day of the week to potentially find out you're pregnant with your ex's baby?
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
Also apparently I made a "cake sandwich"--yeah smashed a massive piece of cake between two slices of bread....fucking tequila
Bad part of last night: I puked in my hair. Good part of last night: I assembled a posse.
You kept pulling me aside saying "look what I found"
Of course he did! You’ve seen my tits, you know he didn’t stand a chance!
Randomize
