you ended the night by relentlessly sucking on my hips bone and hand demanding milk. you said it was because you were a tiger
my vag is singing 'hurts so good' by john mellencamp
I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
Do you think there is vodka in heaven?
you let me eat a milky way from your vagina. G is not lettin you hang out for eternity
Standing here next to my mom talking to my friend trying to act like he doesn't sell me E every weekend.
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
I just found my "random bang list for summer of 2012" that I wrote last night.. It's written on a Plan B receipt. If this isn't irony I don't know what is.
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
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