At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
These headphones make me feel like I'm sitting on John Mayers lap and he's singing just to me. I picture like a pitch black room with a single spotlight on us. Also, convinced Kyle to give me percocet soo.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
she was drinking until 3, woke up at 7, shouted 'I'M STILL DRUNK" and went out for a jog in her thong
Shit, my parents are coming over and I just realized that a grinder is not an acceptable paperweight
At the end of the date, he asked if he could kiss me. I really wanted to say "dude, I didn't shave for nothing"
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
I felt like I should've driven him home but I was holding in a fart and just needed him to leave
I literally just told you I found out I masturbate in my sleep. I think we can be snapchat friends again
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
There's a guy in a plaid shirt running around asking everyone if they want to head butt him
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