my mom just informed me that i masturbate loudly
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
Just remembered seeing jalepenos in my vomit last night. Reminded me to thank you for sharing your queso with me. You're a good friend.
Multiple bruises and a hell of a headache later, I have still to find out where the fuck I picked up the bottom half of a mannequin.
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize