Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
Something growled at me in your dark backyard last nt. Hoping it was my landwalking laser sharks and not Andy.
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
at john mayer concert. alone. to many highschool kids. i feel like a drunk chaperone with a pomegranite martini mustache
Only your wife would write 'for deposit only' on the back of that $1500 check knowing full and well our capabilities of spending it on strippers and booze
You. Dating a sex offender cop. Life writes itself sometimes.
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
Her cop pants made me imagine I was riding a unicorn and by unicorn I mean her face
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.
Vegas never ceases to amaze me. Hung out with a stripper from ATL all night and got nuthin, but the next night meet a bride-to-be who gives me a bj in the elevator.
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
Randomize
