Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
He's coming over tonight...I really wish I didn't have my period right now...
I believe I'm witnessing the first time ever that you wished your period would NOT come....
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
He asked if I wanted to "hang out"
A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
i passed out twice in the shower, twice on the bathroom floor, once holding the toilet bowl and 8 times moving from the bathroom to my bed. Tequila sucks.
I knew it was a bad night when the only thing I could remember was you force feeding me tortilla chips as I hugged the tire of my car and begged to have my stomach pumped.
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
I FOUND THE LEGS
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
How do I tell this guy that if he does not like the condoms at my apartment, he should bring his own without sounding like a sure thing?
Say it's BYOC night at the beach. And, you are a sure thing. Own it.
Help. Why am I so naked?
Randomize
