I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
So I just saw a commercial for tickle me Elmo furry gloves. And I thought hmm I bet I could jerk off with those. Is that a sign of deepseated charachter issues?
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
I just found out I was conceived in a rehab facility... that's better than finding out your dad could be someone else right?
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
please dont pick me up from the airport dressed like a terrorist.
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
The moment you realize you should grow up: you're snorting your fathers percocet script with your old health insurance card, while your parents are on a 10 day cruise in the carribean...
I love birth control. How's that for a Facebook status on valentines day.
apparently my new 420 ritual is to look at the clock at 4:20 and realize i'm already too high
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
Randomize
