So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
So apparently when I was 2, I went around drinking everybody's beer at some wedding, then passed out in a corner....
This explains a lot.
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
If she were to ever cheat on her husband, I'm positive I'm the the go to guy. Which flatters me and weirds me out at the same time.
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
I just tried to brush my hair with a can opener. Who gave you that brownie
I just googled "creative ways to tell someone you'll give them a blow job". I'm losing my touch.
The awkward moment when a lady ask you what kind of lipliner you're using, but really I have just finished eating hot cheetos.
I never thought my gollum impression would lead to me getting laid.
Huzzah!
I added our drug dealer to the quickbooks software babe, he is listed under vendor's as an expense category... money management is such a bitch...
Randomize
