If you die in college, do you die in real life?
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
Hey I think I found part of your tooth next to your wine bottle in the floor board of my car.
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
How many times can I tell him that I wasn't expecting sex before he finally figures out that I'm just too lazy to shave?
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
Just pulled a Kenny Powers on a snowmobile
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
Randomize
