I think condoms have that nasty latex smell to remind you in the morning of how gross you are.
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
omg he fucking fingered me this morning. and i was just like this is the most awkward alarm clock ive ever had
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
Remember that time I hopped home naked from the bar, then tried to convince you I was ok to drive you home? Good call on the taxi.
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
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