In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
After throwing up, the toothpaste tasted so good. Thank you for not letting me eat it.
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
My unemployment came through so I'd like to thank the taxpayers of Utah in advance for my level of intoxication this weekend
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
i had a super strange, mommy/daddy issuestastic, mildly freudian, i-might-as-well-become-a-stripper-now-and-stop-fighting-the-inevitable dream last night :(
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
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