i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
my mom is pro-life. I dare you to fuck me.
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
remind me to get a blood sugar test this week. I'm pretty sure I'm a mojito away from diabetes.
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
Okay, new plan. Get drunk, eat breadsticks. It's going to be great.
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
So! As of five minutes ago I've officially masturbated in every room in my apartment
Dude, I helped you move in yesterday...
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