Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
I just blew up the bathroom at work and now I feel like a new woman
I'm putting on too much make up bc I'm stoned
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
I refuse to go to this wedding alone, or sober. Practice drunk-walking in heels and a Bridesmaid dress begins tonight.
He had me saved in his phone as "Dick Socket". Lets see if I ever fuck him in a bathroom again.
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
whose ass print is on the piano?
Yeah..I guess you know your hair looks like shit when TSA asks to inspect it
Just bought condoms with a walmart gift card. Thanks grandma.
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
Randomize
