we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
Just spit on a sock to clean a spot on my glass table. Oddest combination of so lazy and motivated ever.
He could list all of the presidents! Every one, and in order!! I was so impressed the least I could do was give him a blow job.
Ah, yes. Making our founding fathers proud.
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
did i call you last night crying about tacos and the royal wedding again?
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
Randomize