I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
I am going to wait until he wakes up to set his couch on fire and then pee it out. That way he knows it was not an accident.
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
id say I'm a pretty good fuck buddy, i didn't even booty call him on his girlfriends birthday
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
My wife climbed on top of me, fucked my brains out, and gave me money from the ATM. I'm living the dream.
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
Randomize
